heart-wings

A year ago, my psychic told me that the man I would spend my life would be the type of guy who my family and friends would judge and it would be my job to show them all why he is the love of my life.

So when I received an email on Match from an overweight Harley riding tattooed fisherman from Suffolk, I replied, considering that the people in my life would surely judge this guy!

My psychic also pulled a tarot card during my reading that had two wings on it and he interpreted the card to mean that together we would be two wings and together we would fly.

So when Justin told me that he flew planes I started browsing wedding magazines and picking out baby names.

We were definitely different….that was for sure! But through his emails and then texts, I really started to like him. He was an absolute sweetheart.

After a 2.5 hour phone conversation we decided to meet for coffee.   I prayed I would be attracted to him….

Justin was big. Justin was a very big boy. He was 6’0 tall and probably weighed close to 300lbs.

I’ve never dated a guy with a few extra pounds on him and Justin had a bit more than a few extra pounds but he really was such a sweet guy…..

Assuming he would be able to fuck me I figured I’d be able to get over the weight issue.

Plus, as we headed into Dunkin Donuts I felt like a size 2!

I loved talking to Justin for those 2 hours. He was so cute and interesting. He thought I was a hoot and told me that I was even more beautiful in person. We talked about riding his Harley together and told me where I could buy riding boots. He offered to take me out on his friends boat so that we could go fishing. I told him that I’d never been out to wine country and he told me that there is no better way to experience wine country than on a bike in the summer and that he’d love to take me out there.

Before leaving Dunkin, Justin asked me what my plans were for the coming weekend. He asked to take me to an early dinner Sunday night and I told him that I’d love to.

It doesn’t happen often that I’m asked out on a 2nd date before the 1st date ends so I was beaming from ear to ear as we headed out.

He walked me to my car. We stood in the parking lot for anther few minutes chatting.   I was patiently waiting for a goodnight kiss, which never came, instead we hugged.

We would kiss…when the time was right.

Thursday

Justin: Heyyyy I had a great time tonight. I just got home.
WinterInNYC: Wow that was fast! I had a great time too – thank you again for the coffee 🙂 I know u sacrificed for me and didn’t get ur Starbucks
Justin: Anytime! I had a great time as well. It’s ok about the Starbucks. I was in good company so I was happy 🙂
WinterInNYC: 🙂

 

Friday

WinterInNYC: What’s up?
Justin: In bed LOL dog was sick all night and kept me up
WinterInNYC: Ugh
Justin: He’s really not doing well. I’m gunna take him to the vet now. Something is wrong.
WinterInNYC: Poor thing 😦 keep me posted
Justin: Starting to worry me
WinterInNYC: He may just have a bug. See what the vet says. Try not to worry.
WinterInNYC: Everything ok?
Justin: They r doing tests….
WinterInNYC: u ok?

 

Saturday

WinterInNYC: Justin?
Justin: Hey. Sorry I didn’t get back to u last night. Came home after the vet and passed out. They kept him at the vet for observation.
WinterInNYC: How’s he doing?
Justin: He was really crappy last night when I left him. Gunna head there in a bit.
WinterInNYC: What r ur plans for today?

 

Sunday

WinterInNYC: I’m so confused

Not hearing back from Justin was so surprising and incredibly unexpected that I started to think that something had happened to him.

I thought his dog died. I thought his father died. I thought his plane crashed. I thought he got into a motorcycle accident and was in the hospital.

There was no way after the date we had, the fact that he asked me out for a 2nd date and called and texted the previous two weeks as often as he did that he was blowing me off.

He was dead. I convinced myself.

But then one quick call to his office Monday morning confirmed that Justin was alive and well.

Nothing had happened to him.

I just went out on a date with a dick.

If you can explain to me what happened, I’ll either blow you, or blow your husband/boyfriend for you so you don’t have to!

 

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Back in September I went to a psychic for a reading. Don’t judge me!

Although he came highly recommended by my friend Marilyn, I was super nervous. Was I about to find out that I would die childless and alone?

Daniel the psychic immediately put me at ease and used tarot cards to read my future.

The reading was over an hour long but here are some of the highlights with my comments:

He immediately pointed out that the past two years were rough for me. I’m in the process of healing and once I do I will emerge more alive, lovely and fresh…a new me. I have been working hard and will need to continue to do so.

Found out my boyfriend of 3.5 years was cheating on me. Have been on countless horrendous online blind dates ever since and haven’t had a guy in my life for more than a month since the break-up. Yeah, the past 2 years have sucked Daniel..thanks for the reminder!!!

The emotional content in my life drains me. I go into the world projecting Marilyn Monroe but I’m more like Norma Jean, shy and vulnerable. I project power so that I am not taken advantage of.

For those of you who truly know me, you would know that this is a pretty accurate description. It’s exhausting….

October will be a big month for me. Nothing to fear but I would be making new choices.

I was offered a new job in October and accepted it.

I was right to let go of my past relationships. They weren’t the right guys for me.

Wait what? The alcoholic emotionally unavailable cheater wasn’t right for me???

2014 will not disappoint me. I will have true happiness and it will continue for the next 5 years. By 2015 I’ll know who the love of my life will be. This man will be a bit of a devil. I may get judgment from others and I will have to show them how great he is. He will love life and love me and want to be happy and bring a great smile to my life. I will have one daughter in 2016.

God I fucking hope so!!!!

I left the reading with exactly what I was looking for…a glimmer of hope.

I also left with a crystal that Daniel chose specifically for me. He gave me a chevron amethyst also known as the third eye crystal.

This crystal allows me to know more than I even know now. They have lines that run through them to allow for things to run smoothly in my life. The way I see things will continue to make sense and I won’t have a hard time making decisions.

Daniel told me to experiment with the crystal. He suggested I keep it in my bag when I go on a date.

Well…a handful of bad blind dates and then dating a much too thin barista with premature ejaculation for a month really made me question the amethyst and its magical love matching capabilities.

Fuck the bag…I’m just going to shove the amethyst up my vagina and see what happens!